Loving someone to madness can be a big problem. Even more so when you are a girl who has been insecure for a long time or who has had fears due to bad experiences of the past and that we still can not overcome. The need to feel loved at every minute of the day becomes an obsession and during the process, we do odious things, hoping that they give us control of the relationship to be sure that he only has eyes, time and life for us. .
It is clear that when we do this, the only thing we achieve is totally the opposite of what we believe we are achieving. And worst of all, we begin to sabotage ourselves and act in a way that we are not and do not want to be.
They say that it is very funny how when we are doing better in life, it is when we put our feet together to cause problems and ruin those beautiful things that are happening to us.
Recently my boyfriend got tired of my personality and I ended and today, after analyzing for many days everything I did to ruin our relationship, I can say that I did many really silly and pointless things, which I felt would give me control , security and they would have it “tied” to me for life. Today I want to share with you, because in fact, many of us do it, but not all of us manage to realize it in time.
Require her to eliminate her friends
And even the friends that we feel are “drunk” or that we do not like.
Change our personality … little by little
Many of us began (without realizing it and without wanting it) to change our way of being, and we ended up being totally the opposite of when we began the engagement.
Harass him until he goes to the bathroom
If you put your cell phone, we begin to question why you put your cell phone? … Something crazy.
Ask for explanations when he does not have to give them
“Why did not you answer the message at the exact moment I sent it to you?”, “Why did that old woman like you?”, “Why do you like that song? Sure it reminds you of someone. Calm! There is no need to harass him.
Believe us smarter than him
Acting and doing things that we believe he will not notice as “suspicious” will cause him to lose confidence in us. If you have any concerns, it is better that you tell them and not go around feeling them. Do not make him feel like he’s a fool.
Questioning him for his ex-girlfriends
We would not have to care about the relationships that happened before we met him.
Believe us your mom
Telling him what to do and when to do it is something no one likes. Even less when you feel that you are the one that can give you and not give permission to go somewhere or to do things.
Making a tantrum when we want to get something
I do not know what the intention is or why we do it, but this does not make us look tender. Quite the opposite.
Not knowing how to accept guilt or give an apology
Definitely this is the worst mistake of many of us (myself included). And I learned the bad. If only I had known that an apology does not make us “less strong”, my relationship would have been different.
Wanting to “flip” things
How many times do we not try to turn things around when we do not like being told our truths? And worst of all, we do the impossible so that instead of talking and solving the problem, he ends up asking us for forgiveness.